Almost 3 Weeks In

I find myself in a bit of a cloud this morning. Kind of foggy. Overall I have been getting fairly good sleep so I really can't complain but.....I think I feel some complaining on the horizon. Yup! I am wanting to complain this morning. So....here goes.

Tell me why Heidi will sleep in her cradle for her naps during the day but as soon as night time rolls around she thinks she needs to sleep on me? Seriously, as soon as I crawl into bed she wakes up and isn't consolable unless she is laying on my chest. Shortly after nestling into my chest she enters a nice peaceful oblivion. Is it the sound of my heartbeat? The familiar smell? But why will she sleep during the day without being on me? For some reason last night I found myself getting a bit frustrated. I just really want to sleep in our bed but am spending the nights on the couch with the little miss. I have decided it would be really nice if Mark also was lactating so he could take a night shift. Sadly, I don't think that is going to happen anytime soon. Or in this lifetime.

She isn't the most content when awake either. I decided to go ahead and cut dairy out of my diet to see how much change there is. All of our kids seemed to really mind when I had dairy so *sob* there will be a lot less dairy for me over the next months. Something I am eating is creating quite a bit of discomfort in her belly and I am pretty sure this is the culprit.

Enough complaining now. She is growing beautifully - at her 2 week check she weighed in at a little over 8 pounds. In the midst of the fog I can recognize God's sovereignty in bringing her into our lives. We were unaware that we needed her but He wasn't. We are in love with her and watching all the kids interact with her brings immense joy to my heart!

Everyone seems to be adjusting well and this has been the easiest transition by far. I guess you wouldn't know it from my previous complaining. Just bear with me. I think with each child you have you know what to expect a little bit more, you lower your expectations a little bit more and you just roll with things.

Eden loves "her" baby and likes to hold her a lot. Last week on two different occasions Eden threatened to flick the baby when I was disciplining her. I was amazed that Eden could even process all of that in her little head. I have to watch her pretty closely. She has been extremely ornery lately and spending quite a bit of time in time out on her bed. Eden is so similar to Shane in her stubborn/strong/independent (insert any number of adjectives here) will. Another way she is similar to Shane is this: when she realizes I am getting frustrated with her (the tone of my voice) she gets great satisfaction. She will laugh at me as I am attempting to correct and discipline her because of attitude and behaviour. Which of course makes me even more upset. Lord help us!!! She takes a considerable amount of energy right now but I am convinced that when we come out on the other side we will have the sweetest little girl on our hands.

I guess it is time for me to run. Speaking of Eden - she is tormenting Tristan to the point that he is in a heap on the floor screaming. She is acting as though she is completely innocent and oblivious to the obvious frustration she is inflicting on her brother. And what is the fight about you ask? Some stupid little baby spoons Tristan found in the silverware drawer this morning. Sometimes I think that life would be so much easier if we got rid of every single item in our home and just lived in a bare house. But then I am sure someone would touch someone else and then we would have to start removing appendages from the kids so they couldn't touch each other. And then someone would look at someone else and then what would we do? And then quite possibly someone would breathe too loudly or chew too loudly. Oh the beauty of living together in harmony.