Honesty...Friends...Grateful

First I just want to say I am realizing that my blog needs some serious revamping and updating. I'll get right on that in all my spare time. Which means it may be a while until it actually happens.

I know the title of my post may be a little vague. If you keep reading it will all make sense.

Last week was a really rough week. I'll just state it like it was. Not fun. Felt never ending. Didn't know if I would survive. You get the point. One of those weeks that started spiraling and I just couldn't seem to get it back together. To refresh your memory I just had a baby, remember? And for those of you moms who have gone through childbirth you will know what I am talking about when I say you hit a wall about 3 weeks into the whole process. That was last week for me. I was cruising along, amazed at how smooth the transition was going and wham!!! Didn't see the wall in my vision but I sure ran into it at a fairly high rate of speed. The contributing factors were these: hormones that apparently were crazy, an almost 2 year old daughter that has decided to become almost not human in her behavior towards me, a 3 week old baby that would only sleep if held by me (day or night) and a 3 week old baby that for lack of a better word was colicky! I have heard that colic existed but have been fortunate enough to have dodge the bullet with all the other kiddos. Not this time!

Let me just paint a picture of the typical scenario for you on any given day of last week. Heidi is screaming, hasn't slept in 4 hours, aching shoulders (still getting over bursitis) from holding Heidi, bags under my eyes that you could go camping in if you needed a place to pitch a tent......sit down to nurse Heidi, she starts gulping away, Eden decides to sass me (No..I Not) over something completely trivial, I instruct Eden to go to her room and sit on her bed for a time out, she says again (No....I Not), so Heidi's eating is interrupted, the mom bodily removes Eden from the room and plops her on her bed, come back to the living room to an irate little baby because she is hungry and not happy to be interrupted, get her back to gulping away, Eden emerges and the whole thing is repeated within about 5 minutes. No lie!! This week Eden has started moving away from telling me no about everything and instead yells in a very loud and authoritative voice, "You a stinker!" when asked by me to listen. Geesh!!!

So....back to the story. My week was falling apart around me into a miserable heap. Or so I thought. I kept telling myself to remain objective, focus on everyday and not to think too far ahead. I kept thinking something I was eating was bothering Heidi and finally I realized that she fits the whole "colic" routine pretty darn well. Ahhh!!!!

Thursday rolls around and I call my friend Sara. I leave a message and try to get a hold of my mom. I leave a message with her as well. Shortly after I call Mark pretty much sobbing and saying, "I don't think I'm cut out for this." He listens, tells me I am doing great, tells me that he will try to make it a shorter day, to hang in there - all the right and true things to say. Then Sara calls me and I vent for a while, feel much much better and can go on with my day with a significantly lighter step.

Friday morning rolls around and I load Heidi up and head to a new chiropractor. I was so excited to see this doctor. He is new(er) in town and goes to our church. I was going for myself because my shoulders were so painfully tight. Turns out he had adjusted 3 babies by the time I got there in the morning. He worked on Heidi as well and we are seeing pretty significant changes in her. She has slept in her cradle the past two nights (first time ever) and overall hasn't cried nearly as much. We have some more treatments to go but they have tremendous results with colicky kiddos.

While at the chiropractor Sara shows up and so does another friend Ciara. They state they are there to rescue me!! I haven't felt that loved in so, so long! Sara carved out a chunk of her day to do whatever I wanted to do. It was amazing!! We got some lunch, I bought some new jeans (since I can't wear my other ones) got groceries and just had fun connecting and being together. Seriously, amazing!!! And just what I needed. I have never been "rescued" like that and have determined it is one of the best things a friend can do for another friend.

Back to the title. I almost didn't call Sara last Thursday because I didn't want to be perceived as a downer. I finally decided that my need outweighed what someone may perceive about me. And of course since she is a mother herself she has run into the same wall I found myself hitting my head against. If I wouldn't have called and been honest, I would have missed out on being blessed by my friends' love.

Oh...how I need other women to be in my life. I am so grateful for the friends I have. I have had so much help and company since Heidi's birth. Lara and Barb coming to do some cleaning, play with my kids, make lunch and make me sit on the couch. Lara coming back with her kids to play with my kids and just sitting on the couch talking, Sara bringing her kids over to play and making lunch (as well as bringing the lunch with her). I could go on and on. My mom, my mother-in-law and countless others who have called, sent messages and loved me from afar.

I am grateful tonight as I look back over the past few weeks. My friends, sisters (in-laws too) and moms - all are amazing women and I am better because of them. And tomorrow night I get another dose of fun women - Bunko!!! Whoohoo!!! Can't wait.