Setting the Record Straight

There is a popular misconception that has been making its rounds. I have heard its deception in many conversations I have had with friends and strangers alike. It is the misconception that if a person has a lot of children they have been endowed with more than average amounts of grace and patience. Let me just say I have not found that statement to hold any truth at all. Here is what I have learned.

I have looked at other people's lives and said so many times that I don't think I could live their lives. Whether it be hardships they are facing, heartache they are trudging through or actual blessings they have been given. And do you know why I can't comprehend living their lives? Because God has not graced me to live their lives - he has graced me to live mine.

I have people say to me often, "I cannot imagine having 5 children. I only have "_" and can hardly keep my sanity. " Or I hear, "I don't feel like I could be a good mom to more than "_". First of all, for the record, I don't think 5 children is lots of kids. A lot of the blogs I read the families have 9 or 10 kids. So...it is all relative.

But..back to the matter at hand. When we make comments like, "I cannot imagine having 5 kids" and "I don't think I could be a good mom to more than however many kids" we are clearly walking in our strength! If we control our lives and live a safe life we can manage everything by ourselves. When we begin to live outside of what feels humanly possible we see God's hand at work.

I have been stretched more this past year in many ways. Have they all been easy? No. Would I trade the lessons I have been learning? Never. Has Gods grace been evident? If I actually gave Him the room to work in me and through me. That is the thing about God. He doesn't push Himself on you. He is exceedingly patient but the moment we acknowledge our need for Him, He is there.

One morning this week I woke in my typical fashion. After an extremely restless night of being up 5 times with Heidi, I was not in the mood to be awakened by Eden at 5:50. I wish I could say I wake up with a smile and soft words for my kids. But usually I wake up pretty grumpy because frankly I feel like I have a right to be grumpy. Who wants to get up at 5:50 after being up all night? And why does Eden have to be so chipper first thing in the morning? Couldn't it take her 30 minutes to wake up?

Heidi had an ear infection and is now on round two of antibiotics since it didn't clear up. Those of you with children know what nights are like with sick kiddos. Enough whining. Sorry. I digress.

I woke up bright and early, grumpy like usual and said to Mark, "Seriously! How am I supposed to function on no sleep. God couldn't give us a child who sleeps? I can't do this today." Sad, huh? Hope you really didn't think I was something special because I am human in every way. These words have left my mouth more times than I can count. But this time something hit me. I am not supposed to do this on my own. In my weakness He is strong. Am I right?

So...I started my morning over and asked God to make that promise real and evident in my life that day. It was not a perfect day but I must say it was one of the best days we have had in a while. By simply being aware that allowing Him to live in me and sustain me I don't have to hold it all together.

We really cannot project ourselves into other people's lives and say whether we could live their lives. They aren't ours to live, remember? God's grace is available when we need it. And if God happens to hand life circumstances that feel overwhelming at the moment my guess is that in due time you will realize He has equipped you and graced you to walk them out with dignity.

Now....if only I could get a better grasp on living my life that way. There is never a shortage of opportunities on any given day.