Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Eden's birth mother

I have found myself thinking about Eden's first mother so often lately. Maybe it is because we are rapidly approaching the one year anniversary of her death. I look at Eden every day and wonder what parts of her are like her mother. Her sparkly eyes, her feisty spirit, her determination, her love of shoes.......so many things. I can only imagine that someday these things will feel so important to Eden and I won't have any way of answering her questions. How big she was when she was born, does she look/act like her mom or dad, her natural ability to move to music (although this is Ethiopians in general). I love everything about this little girl! Including the fits she throws at Target and Wal-Mart when we walk away from the shoe departments without buying any shoes for her. I have determined that in the future I will avoid the shoe departments in every store unless I am prepared and willing to buy her some shoes. Otherwise everyone looks at us while she screams in the cart "shoes! shoes!" with tears running down her cheeks. Please don't think I am awful for not giving into her every shoe whim.


We are really blessed to have the information on Eden's family that we do have. I am pretty sure I would find it nearly impossible to raise a beautiful child knowing her mother was on the other side of the world thinking of her daily. I read other families stories of meeting the birth parents and I think my heart would never heal from the pain I would feel upon meeting the family and promising to love their child. I wish Eden's mom, Alemnesh, could see her little girl today though. She would be unbelievably proud I'm sure because I am unbelievably proud of her! She is beautiful, funny, sassy and endearing. My friend Tori calls her "sassy pants" and that is pretty accurate.


Sometimes I wonder if Eden's mother knew she was dying far in advance. Or did she die from a sudden illness. Did she wonder what would become of her sweet little girl? I know that a few times last spring/summer I felt a strong urge to pray for peace for my daughter's mother. Of course we didn't know if our daughter was even alive yet. I think back to some of the time tables of when I prayed and I am confident God spoke to her mother. I remember specifically praying that God would reveal us to her mother in her dreams and just give her a peace that her baby would be loved and taken care of. Eden has now been in our arms and home longer than any other place. From our court documents this is what we have gathered: she was with her mother until her death on August 20th. For the next two months it is noted that her maternal uncle tried to find volunteer people in their area to take care of her but couldn't find anyone. She was then entrusted to any available centre in their town. At the beginning of December her uncle had to bring three witnesses to court to testify that her parents were deceased. At that time she was transferred to the main orphanage in Addis Ababa to be placed with a family - us!! If I think about those months of her being shifted around after the loss of her mother I can almost loose it! I am amazed at how happy and well adjusted she is after experiencing all she has experienced.

So today I want to honor her first mother and her forever birth mother, Alemnesh! Thank you brave woman for the gift of life you gave to Eden and the gift of life you gave to us!

1 comment:

Christine said...

I REALLY have to stop reading your blog while I'm at work! Geesh! Wiping tears away and everything. I am excited one day to be a mother and thanks to your honesty and expressive writing, it's very tangible! (Oh, and maybe the fact that I'm going to be a wife soon makes it more of a reality) :)