Day 5

Finally, Eden was in her Daddy's arms. Again she didn't cry - just really looked him over good. I was amazed at the different emotions I felt seeing Mark holding his little girl. He was so, so pleased!!! We spent the morning playing with her and holding her. I also spent time running around outside and hanging out with some of the other kiddos.

One of the traditions that is held dear in Ethiopia is their coffee ceremony. Knowing how much Mark and I both love coffee I was just excited for their coffee in general. I spent two afternoons outside with different of the house staff as they had their coffee ceremony. I couldn't understand anything they were chatting about but I just savored the smells, the wonderful sound of their language and just willed myself to never forget the experience. I felt honored that they would allow me to kind of intrude in their daily life. I asked the house staff on Friday if they would have time to do another coffee ceremony when Mark arrived. They said sure!! Saturday after lunch they held a traditional ceremony for us which meant the woman performing the ceremony dressed in traditional Ethiopian dress and they did fresh rose petals strewn around the floor.

These are three of the women that took care of me while I stayed at the villa and the woman in the middle is the one who performed the coffee ceremony for us. I don't have any real good pictures from this day but I will tell you what the ceremony entails. I do have pictures from a ceremony outside but this one was so pretty and elegantly done. They take fresh, green coffee beans and roast them on a somewhat contoured plate over a charcoal pit. Once the beans have that burnt smell (ummmm I love that smell) they take them off the pit. They remove a few charcoal/wood pieces and put them in another container. They put some sort of wood chips (I think) onto the pieces they removed and they start smoking. They then take a stick of incense and place it on the same pieces. The smells are intoxicating!!

This coffee pot is then placed on the charcoal pit and the water starts heaing up. While the water begins to boil they grind the coffee beans by hand into a really fine powder. The grinds then go into the pot and they start letting it simmer.

When the coffee is ready it is poured into little individual cups that you see pictured here on the little while table. Oh man.....the coffee is strong but out of this world delicious!! They also roast popcorn and you can snack on that while you wait for the coffee to be done. The whole process takes close to 45 minutes and it is co relaxing. I don't know how often I would make coffee if that was the process I had to go through. There are a few things I told myself not to complain about ever again after returning to the States. Making a pot of coffee was one of them and the other big one was laundry. You should have seen the amounts of laundry that was done EVERY day at the orphanage - and all by hand!!! And every day when I walked past the women doing the laundry they would wave and give me beautiful big smiles. Made me feel like a complete moron!!

In the evening our driver took us downtown to a traditional Ethiopian resteraurant. This was one of the highlights of our trip. The food was outrageous and the entertainment was breathtaking! They had a live band playing traditional music (of course) and there were four dancers who did different tribal dances from different parts of Ethiopia. It was amazing!!! I have no idea how they make their bodies move like that. So controlled and perfect. At one point Mark and I looked at our driver and another guide that was along and said, "How do they make their shoulders do that?" They both proceeded to make their shoulders do the exact same thing!!! So, we kindly informed them what they already knew - there was no way we could move like that!! The atmosphere in the place was relaxed and there was a woman doing the coffee ceremony on a much larger scale. In the middle of dinner the lights suddendly went out. Welcome to a third world country!!! There was no power for close to 10 minutes. Of course Mark and I said, "What happens next?" Wendi said, "You just wait to see if the power comes back on." Okay??!! It did return and we were able to pay our bill and leave.

Day 4

Upon arriving at the orphanage on Friday morning I ran into this little guy and about 25 of his side kicks. Now I know this isn't a great picture but it was the best I could do. He was on the move. Just the night before while journaling I commented on how ironic it was that I hadn't felt drawn to any of the other children. I was just surprised because I thought I would fall in love with every child I saw/met. Well........this little guy could have walked right out the gate with me and never looked back. I was smitten!! Something about his mischievous eyes and sly grin. Oh man, was he cute!

And then this little miss cut into the photo shoot. She had so much personality! She would come just close enough for me to tickle her belly and then run away laughing. We played this little game for a while - until someone else wanted my attention. I absolutely LOVE this age group. They were probably all just shy of 2 years old. So much energy, curiosity and just plain cuteness.

Here she is again trying to engage me in a game. Again, she could have joined the little guy above in walking out the gate. Problem is we would be outgrowing our house by now. Oh well, it is all hypothetical. Unless one of you reading this thinks they could walk out the gate with you?! How about it?

This handsome young man was sitting observing all the little munchkins running around. He had the most gentle spirit. A lot of the kids his age would clamor for attention and a chance at the camera. I wouldn't say he was passive - just respectful! I would estimate his age somewhere around 10 years old. People, these children are beautiful!! Both inside and out. I didn't get a chance to find out his name but I can guarantee he would jump at the chance to have a family.

This is another little boy who confiscated my camera and decided to have his very own photo shoot. Wow!! He was a little more "in your face" but at least he was confident!

Just ignore this picture. I tried to get it landscaped but it posted before turning. And silly me couldn't figure out how to delete the picture. These are the glitches you have when you aren't completely blogger savvy. But if you have the unique ability to detach your head and turn it sideways, this is the same young man pictured above.

These are flowers at the guest house. I enjoyed the gardens and flowers so much after our long winter.

Today was the day that Mark was arriving and I could hardly wait for him to meet Eden, experience the city, experience the people and just fall in love with Eden's country. Plus, I had four days worth of talking to do. Poor man - he thinks getting home from work at the end of the day nets him an earful - he was in for a mass download of information. I had a new driver on this day (which I will talk about next post) and we arrived at the airport just before Mark's flight was scheduled to arrive. Upon finally getting inside past multiple checkpoints and showing of our passports we realized Mark's flight had arrived early. It all worked out perfectly - he had just obtained his visa and made it through customs when we saw him. I don't know the last time I was so excited to see my man!!

It was fun driving through the city with him for the first time. Things that were becoming normal to me (men peeing along the road, no traffic lights, people walking in the streets, etc) were a surprise to him. We did a lot of laughing on the way to the guesthouse. And you guessed it - they had a feast for us to eat upon our arrival!! We could hardly wait for Saturday morning to dawn - this was the day we would finally get to spend time together with Eden!!!

Long Days

Today I am not blogging about the trip. Why? I am plum worn out. I got sucker punched with this silly cold/fever/sore throat/hacking cough and it just seems to really like me. For some reason it does not want to leave. Although today is the first day (in 5 days) that my throat feels normal and my coughing isn't quite as bad. The lack of coughing could be the Mucinex I took. My fever seems to have left as well. So......things are looking up. My wonderful mother-in-law came today for 6 1/2 hours! Honestly, I don't know if I could have made it today without her. I'm sure I could have dug deep into some reserve somewhere but wow - I am really glad she was here!! I was able to sleep for a while this afternoon which I'm sure is exactly what this body needed.

Eden is still sleeping like a champ and hasn't seemed to miss a beat. Tristan on the other hand - well the novelty has worn off and reality has set in. He isn't too thrilled with the new reality and is pretty vocal about things. And when I say vocal I don't mean expressing his fears/anxiety/anger by talking things through with me. I mean lots of screaming!!!! Mercy, that child has a set of lungs!! I keep telling myself that when my body is recovered from this dreadful plague and my energy levels are back things will feel a little more manageable. I'll be honest folks. I have had more than one moment of "what exactly were we thinking?!" But then I remember what my Aunt Mim told me during one of my freaking out motherhood moments. Something along the lines of not questioning our decisions based on the emotions of my difficult days. Because lets just all face things - some days really stink in this whole parenting thing. Thankfully for me I can usually see humor in the midst of things and I always thank God for my tribe at the end of the day when I kiss them one last time before tucking myself in. They are all a beautiful blessing from Him and an incredible entrustment!!!!

So lets hear three cheers for the difficult days as well as the days filled with ease. And maybe amongst the cheering you can send up a prayer to my Father that Tristan would feel extra peace and security in his place within this family. By the way, I absolutely adore all of my children and I don't mean to sound as though I am complaining. Just venting a little. You all are my therapy today!!

Day 3

As I woke up on this morning I felt very excited knowing this was the day that hopefully everything would be approved by the US Embassy. Meaning Eden would be awarded her Visa and Passport so she could come home with us. I of course spent time with her in the morning holding her and falling more in love with her. Everyday I felt more drawn to her and found myself becoming more comfortable with her. She smiled pretty easily and just seemed like a very content little girl. She was definitely bored with the toys I had brought by this point. I had packed quite a few toys/books but some little guy that lived in our house succeeded in unpacking most of the toys in the suitcase. He is sneaky like that. Eden was noticeably better by Thursday. The first two days I had spent with her she had fever and was incredibly congested. I had spoken with her pediatrician and she assured my she would be okay but of course I was still nervous. Seeing that the fever had broken was a calming factor to me on this otherwise nerve wracking day.

In the afternoon we arrived at the Embassy and met up with the lawyer. By now I was feeling kind of lonely and was just longing to talk to someone without broken English. You know, me being a talker and all. We went through security and were ushered in to a room to wait for our names to be called. What a wonderful surprise upon entering the room - there were multiple American couples also waiting!! This was a win win situation for me. Eden was going to be granted her passport/visa and I could communicate to my hearts content!! I met some really amazing families that afternoon. One of my favorite things about the trip was meeting other adoptive families and hearing their stories. I left the Embassy that afternoon feeling full again. My interview was incredibly easy. Only two questions. And the bonus was I connected with other people. Adding to the ease of the interview was that Eden did exceptionally well. I changed my first poopy diaper at the Embassy and was a little unprepared for the lack of "stuff" upon opening her diaper. After three boys well........you get the point. When we arrived back at the orphanage I was congratulated many times by anyone who knew we had just returned from the Embassy. It was another surreal moment and one step closer to being allowed to come home with our little girl.

Now, I must tell you about the food I was eating while there. It was out of this world good!! My cook studied for two years in Germany and obviously knew what he was doing. Every morning I had a big glass of fresh squeezed orange juice, toast and eggs. At lunch I had a huge salad, my main course that often looked like the picture above and some kind of fresh fruit (papaya, mango, pineapple,banana). For dinner it was soup, bread, a main course and fresh fruit again. I was completely stuffed after every meal. And of course if you didn't come close to eating all of it they were concerned that you didn't like everything. I had told them on the second day that I am not a big meat eater. I am okay eating meat sometimes but I sure do not need it everyday. So what did they do? Made meat everyday at both lunch and dinner. I could not wait for Mark to get there!!! It was a nice break from cooking everyday and everything was well balanced and utterly scrumptious.

This is what my salad looked like everyday. Very, very yummy!!

And this.....well....I have this phobia about driving behind logging trucks, trucks hauling construction equipment or supplies, etc. Lets just say this truck ranked right up there with all my other phobias!! I was not happy driving behind this truck. This truck turned on the street we needed to go on and I was feeling a little bit of anxiety knowing we would be following it up an incline. Apparently my driver thought the truck was moving too slowly - so he honked (warning any pedestrians who were walking) and just whipped out around the truck to pass him. At least we were no longer behind the truck but the fright I received while passing the truck was not too much better. By the end of my trip I was wishing I could try driving amongst the mayhem. But alas, that was not possible. Although my one driver said he got his license on the black market. He was probably just kidding but it gives me hope in case I ever return.

A snippet from today

Tristan, Shane and I are all a bit under the weather today. No throwing up - just fevers. But since Tristan had a fever today it seemed to be his hardest day so far since bringing Eden home. He didn't want to share me. I felt bad for the little guy. But, here we are at 8:45 and all four kiddos are in bed for the night. Eden has slept through the night every night since we have been home. Now if we can just get Tristan sleeping through the night consistently. Anyway.....

Judah and I were snuggling a bit on the couch today and watching a little news. Fox news had some stuff about President Bush and his visit to Croatia. Judah started asking what all the president does. I tried to explain the job of the president in a way that he could understand everything. This was his conclusion:

Judah: I guess I don't really want to be a president. I would much rather be a hunter!!

So there you have it folks. We have a hunter on our hands. He spent quite a bit of time today outside with his bb gun trying to shoot a bird. He said he was successful in hitting a duck but it flew away. He is determined to shoot a bird and kill it. Hopefully sometime in the near future we will be celebrating his first kill. Now there is a sentence I didn't ever anticipate saying. Oh well.

Day 2

Day two dawned very much the same as the day before. Beautiful sunny weather and a wonderful breakfast. There was even more anticipation leading up to my driver coming to pick me up and take me to Eden. Would she remember me? Would she seem more comfortable today? I arrived at the orphanage and went into the visiting room. There were two other families already in the room and I was pretty sure they were waiting to meet their little people. They were from France so we were able to communicate on a limited basis. I found out they were in fact waiting to meet their children - one couple was adopting a 4 year old little girl and the other couple was adopting a 3 year old boy and 4 year old girl. Eden arrived first and seemed just as comfortable with me as the day before. I felt so proud holding her and showing her to these people I had just met. She of course settled in and fell asleep on me - same as the day before. In the meantime, I was privilege to watching these two other couples meet their children. I of course sat on the couch cradling Eden with tears running down my cheeks. These little children were so excited yet very unsure of what was happening. They of course new it was mom and dad but there was a caution to their excitement. I felt so many, many emotions. I have some really sweet pictures of them but decided not to post them since I didn't ask them first. I got to spend the next three days watching them interact with their little ones and I observed many different emotions. The children would vacillate between excitement and mourning. They were so happy to finally have a family yet they were very aware that they were leaving what felt safe to them. Again, the differences in their personalities was fun to watch. The one little girl in particular was so amazingly sweet. Her parents gave her new toys and presents upon their arrival and she promptly turned around to share them with the other two children in the room. She was a very giving child - more than I have ever seen in a little person before.

Also, on this day I met another man that was there through our adoption agency. He and his wife had been in Addis approximately 9 months ago picking up their little girl who was 8 months old. While there he spent a lot of time with the older children at the orphanage. He was drawn to one little girl in particular. He was under the impression that you could not specify a particular child to adopt so he felt confident that he was safeguarding his heart. As the week went on he and his wife decided to see if there was any possible way to bring her home as well. They found out that you can specify an older child since their chances of being placed in a family are very slim. So....long story short he was back in Addis to bring his second daughter home. She is nearly 10 years old and absolutely beautiful!!! She has the sweetest spirit and just radiates life!! I fell in love with her as I spent time with her over the week. It was a joy watching her interact with her new father. She would show me pictures of her momma and her baby sister that were waiting for her. Fast forward to Friday of that week and I watched her say good-bye to her sister and two brothers. They are all older and no longer "adoptable". My heart completely broke watching them. I had to leave and take Eden to another part of the complex. Her older siblings showed nothing but gratitude and appreciation toward her new father. This little girl had been in the orphanage since she was three so I am assuming that all three of her siblings probably spent some time there as well. Seven years of watching your friends come and go and it was finally her turn! I am sitting here getting tears in my eyes just revisiting this experience. There was so much joy yet so much sorrow for me as I thought about the injustice of it all.
This is the darling girl, two of her siblings and her new father. Their story made an incredible impact on my heart.

These were some of the older children being lined up to go back inside after playing outside for a while. They kept waving at me and wanting me to take their pictures. They love having their pictures taken. They say, "photo, photo", wait for you to take their picture and then immediately want to see the results. They start clapping and yelling upon seeing their pictures.

This is Eden with my driver Wendi! He would come to pick me up at the end of visiting with her, promptly take her from my arms, kiss her and talk to her in Amharic. It was so precious. Ethiopian people absolutely adore children!!

This is the house that Eden lived in. I believe it was only infants and toddlers in this house. There were approximately 60-65 children housed here.

One of the guards at the orphanage. He would open the door when we arrived and Wendi beeped. He was such a gentle soul. The little girl on the left followed me around for a few days. She liked to hold my hand and rub my skin. The yellow box the man is holding was her treasured possession. It had a few random things she found on the ground and she held onto it pretty tightly. She opened it for me so I could see what was inside. In my eyes nothing worth saving but in her eyes they were valuable. I guess it is all about perspective.

I came back to the guest house that evening just contemplating my perspective. What do I value? I had spent time today with quite a few precious children who were dirty from playing and had worn the same clothes for a few days in a row. Yet somehow I knew these were the very children that Jesus was talking about in scripture when addressing his disciples from with-holding children from him. I caught a glimpse of God's heart in a way that I had never experienced it before. Everyone of these children was precious, priceless and every bit as special as my girl resting in my arms. My heart broke that night as I looked at pictures back at the villa of my boys at home and realized that all the little people I had played with that day had at one time had parents that loved them every bit as much as I loved my boys. Didn't they also deserve to have parents? Needless to say my heart was heavy as I fell asleep. Not in a guilt ridden way but just a new awareness after being among these orphaned children.

Day 1

This was one of the first moments of holding and kissing Eden. She looks a little scared but she didn't cry.

This was later in the morning and she had warmed up to me and was playing very nicely.

This is one of the watch dogs at the guest house sleeping on the front porch.

This was a view from the porch outside my room. This is the first morning and I was definetely enjoying the sunshine and warm breeze.

I will skip the details of the long trip to arriving in Addis Ababa. Suffice it to say the flights were good, I slept a majority of the way and was very glad to finally have a bed at the end of the trip.

I arrived at 8:40 into Addis Ababa on Monday evening. I was picked up and deposited at the guest house where I would be spending the week. By the time we arrived to the guest house and I had all my things situated it was 10:00. I soon learned that I was expected to come to the dining room and have some soup before retiring for the night. It was some of the best tomato soup I have ever had! The perfect thing after a long trip.

I woke up on Tuesday morning to an absolutely beautiful morning! I realized pretty quickly that every morning dawns in much the same way - mid sixties, sunny, breezy and gorgeous. I had some breakfast and than waited for my driver to come pick me up. Now, the guesthouse where I stayed was all walled of and gated. The gardens were beautiful and everything was very clean and manicured. Tortoises meander around the yard and there are six watch dogs that love attention. After Wendi my driver arrived the gates were opened and we were on our way to the orphanage. It was a whole different world outside of the gates. I will talk more about the city on another day though - right now I was completely anticipating meeting Eden.

We arrived at the orphanage, Wendi beeped the horn, the gates were opened and I finally was allowed into what had been Eden's home for the past 4-5 months. I went into the office, spoke with the secretary and then waited while she notified the nannies of the arrival of Eden's mother. My head was spinning and my stomach felt very nervous. What if she cried when they handed her to me? What if they scrutinized my mothering abilities? Is this really happening?

And then I heard Wendi outside the window say, "Eden Belachew....." and the rest was said in Amharic so I didn't understand anything. Next thing I new she was in my arms and staring intently at my face. There were no tears just intense gazes. She was more beautiful than I ever expected and I felt like I could easily get lost in her eyes. They were so dark, deep and completely seducing. (not in a bad way of course) You just couldn't tear your eyes away. Her hair, her hands, her pouty mouth - everything was new and beautiful.

They ushered me into another room that accommodates families that are visiting their children. She nestled into my arms, looked at my face and promptly fell asleep. I spent the next little while taking her shoes and socks off, looking at her little feet, finding the cutest mole on her thumb, noticing her long eye lashes, touching her skin, feeling her soft curls and basically just falling in love with this little girl that had occupied my thoughts and dreams for so long. I had such mixed feelings. I was elated to have her in my arms yet felt like a stranger. At least she hadn't cried upon being placed in my arms.

Shortly after she fell asleep I was picked up and taken to the lawyers office to finish up the embassy paperwork for Eden. She came with me and I was so nervous. What if she started crying? She was amazing and during the visit to the lawyers office I was privilege to her first smile. I was mesmerized!! Her smile is huge - there is no other way to describe it.

We took her back the orphanage and dropped her off. I was then taken to the guest house for lunch and to rest. Our daily schedule basically consisted of me having breakfast, arriving at the orphanage close to 10:00, leaving at noon to have lunch, arrive back at the orphanage at 3:00 and staying until 5:00. Since we she was legally ours we could sign her out of the orphanage at whatever point we wanted. Our agency advised that we spend a few hours with her in the am and pm and just allow her to stay in her normal environment until the day we left to come home. I am so, so glad we listened. Everyday I felt more connected and as the days went on it became harder and harder to leave her there. By about day 3 she was reaching for me which felt really nice. Had we taken her right away she wouldn't have been comfortable with us and the transition may not have been so smooth.

The first day I was there I found out she had an upper respiratory infection and she was running fever. The nursing staff and pediatrician were wonderful and checked her over really well while I was there. I of course was nervous but her lungs were clear and she had already started amoxicillan the day before I arrived. As the days went on she progressively got better. After arriving home though and taking her to the doctor we realized she now had an ear infection and was still very congested. (complete side note)

After my afternoon visit and dinner I just spent the evening in my room thinking back over the day and journaling my feelings. I felt so blessed to have finally held my little girl and to have kissed her cheeks. She was more than I ever could have imagined!!

I also met two other families that had used the same agency as us. It turns out the one family lives in Penns Creek!! For those of you who don't know that is only 1 1/2 hours from us. Their little girl is the same age as Eden and beautiful as well. They chose to check their little one out on the second day because they had friends in Addis and other parts of Ethiopia that wanted to see her.

At the end of my first day I went to bed feeling very fulfilled but missing my husband and boys back home. My heart ached for them. I new I was in the hands of God and that they were as well but.......still not very easy. So, I fell asleep dreaming of my boys and my little girl only ten minutes away.